Out of many, why does the child just have to be me?
Out of all daughters, why does it have to be her?
Out of all the troubles, why does the one you gave born to is nothing but a disaster?
You must’ve been wondering, what have you ever done to end up being the mother of a being like me.
You must’ve been hurting, what is your sin to end up having the child like me.
You must’ve been regretting, after all the pain to raise me, why did I turn out to be me.

And I am sorry, for always hoping you to ever recognize me.
I am sorry, for secretly hoping that you would be grateful for being a mother to me.
I appologize, for dreaming that you would be thankful that the most precious gift god ever gave to you is me.

I finally realize, that it is me what you hate the most.
And I come to understand, that I have to kill me, just to make you happy..

For that I also feel deeply sorry, for being incapable to kill myself. May in time you will have someone you always wish for in shell that called me. And may you wont regret and missing me after I die one day. You should’ve know, even if it is just the soul, you cant bribg the dead to alive..