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Ah.. I’m kind of a bit too emotional tonight.

Let’s continue our phone-date tomorrow okay?

I’ll just let you know that I’m switching off the internet on this cellphone,

And I’ll turn off the other phone.

Talk to you letter sweetie.

:kiss”

I switch off my phone right away and turn off the internet on the other phone. Right when I was wondering whether I should turn that cellphone off too, his text come:

Your phone, switch it on.”, he said.

What is it? You want to talk about something?”, I asked.

Turn it on, please.”, he answered.

Okay..”, I replied.

As soon as my text reach him, as soon as I switch on my just-turned-off cellphone, he called me. I hold my breath, I tried to hide my trembling voice.

What’s wrong love?

I’m scared. So very am. She, she just talk to me.

What did she said?

I can’t tell..

It’s okay, calm down. I’m sure she didn’t mean to hurt you..

I know, I know but I’m scared.

But I’ll be there and be responsible for you. What are you feeling afraid for?

I can’t shake the fear away. Somehow, I feel so terribly sad. How immature of me right?

That.. has nothing to do with maturity. It just, you are so fragile, and I understand that. Did you know, the reason why you are so sad right now? Because you are a very patient. You tried to hold everything inside, alone. Once you feel so tired, everything just exploded and you can’t stop your sadness. I understand that. I am just like that..

Ah, but I hate showing this side of me to others. Can you just pretend not knowing my current state and leave me alone?

I can’t.

Listen, from now on. Don’t hide your tears. If you feel like crying, do it in front of me. I’ll give you hugs and kisses until you feel better. I’ll listen to your pain. Do not hide away whenever you are in pain. I am your man. It’s my responsibility to shed your tears.

See? You are laughing already. Had I left you alone, I’m sure you’ll cry yourself to sleep. And me? I’ll stay awake all night wondering is my love doing okay over there. Aren’t I amazing?

Yeah.. ahaha. Still, I don’t like the fact that you know this side of me.

That’s okay. All of you, I want to know it all. And it’s not like I’ll tease you by calling you a cry baby anyway right? I’d rather have a woman who likes to cry rather than one who is good in martial art. At least when you are being emotional, I won’t have to accept your kicks and punches. Ahaha

Dummy -.-

But you love me right?

I never said so.

(laugh)

 

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