This is a late post that suppose to be posted on May 27th. Unfortunately I (we) was busy preparing for our engagement day and I am always tired when I reach home. That is why I only manage to write this post now.
Anyway, big news peeps! I am going to get married!
Q: Is this some kind of joke?
A: No, it’s not. Lol
Q: Why so sudden???
A: Why indeed. Surprised?
Q: Yeah! You are love-allergic and all. How can you even get involved with anyone?
A: That’s rude. Ahaha. But that’s right, I have love-allergic. However, fate twists your story in an unimaginable way. Not even in my wildest dream I ever imagine myself to be willingly become someone’s woman. Love? What the heck is that? Proposing me? Are you you of your mind? Meeting my parent to ask for my hand for marriage? That’s it! I’m out.
Q: That’s what I’m saying. So.. how?? Why??
A: How? His parent asked my parent to let me be their daughter in law. My parent said yes. Why? I want to make my parent happy, so is he.
Q: So, in the end. This is all for your parent? – for both of you.
A: Well, at first, yeah. I mean we are both a complete stranger. We know nothing about each other and we are both broken at the same time. How can we welcome someone else? On his side, he was trying to make his parent stop crying out of worries for his well being. Why not get to know this girl? Who knows it’s finally a jackpot? On my side, I was sick of seeing my parent crying out of worries for their daughter who never show any interest in marriage. Why not just let this guy in? Who knows it’s finally a man who meet my parent’s criteria?
Q: I see.. So?
A: Well, we started by chatting on BBM. First chat, we clicked! The way he and I joke around is almost the same. We have the same interest toward music and culture. We knew about stuff each other like to talk about. I was like, God, I’ve never feel so compatible with a man the way I do right now! We fool around and only talk about some light stuff. Slowly, I realize that he has almost everything in my shopping list. I got hooked up. I might get addicted to this, damn.
Q: ..and what exactly is your shopping list?
A: My shopping list is quite difficult, I have to admit that. These is my shopping list:
- Love me, care about me.
- Mature, have his own share of hardship (not a spoiled child).
- Smarter, can follow up my crazy thought.
- Playful, Joke a lot, yet can act as a man when needed to be.
- He prays, have a good religion.
- From a big family, with a great relationship.
- Love my family too.
- Taller than me.
If we are to simplify those list, it comes to: Great personality, Great heart, Good brain, Good looks. Extremely difficult list. All of my ex would only manage to meet one, barely even. Some only have a good brain, some only manage to have a good personalty and other barely manage to have a good looks. What about him? He has all that! One in a million I dare say. He even give me bonuses!
- Love singing.
- Play music.
- He cooks (THIS!!).
- He own musical instrument, a few.
- He drive.
- He find me precious. (CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??)
- He is scared of loosing me.
I almost can’t believe how lucky I am. It feels like God finally give me all of my lifetime happiness.
Q: How about him? How does he feels about you?
A: If I were to write it down, it would sounds a lot like bragging. I do not know about his shopping list, but I understand he want a woman who would see him for who he is, someone to accept all his flaws, someone who would love him unconditionally. He dream about a woman who would treat him as a man and behave like a woman when she is on his side. He dream about a woman who would do her best to protect his heart. To his eyes, I am all that. Well, It’s great if that is really what I am. I do find myself as that type of girl but if I were to admit having all those qualities, that would sounds a lot like bragging right? Lol
Q: Do you love him?
A: Beats me. I do not know what is this thing called love and how exactly does it work. However I do know that being with him is as easy as breathing. I know that it is very hard for me to cry in front of other, all the more if the other party is that of a different gender. However, I become a cry baby in front of him. It’s not heavy for me to spoil him and letting him to do the same. It’s relaxing and very comfortable. I feel really safe when he is around. Remember how I always said that I always have my defense up because of my insecurity? That I only have a ground to stand on and even that was taken away from me? When he is around, it feels like I am being rescued to a great place. It’s not heavenly, but I have a warm ground where I can lay. There might not be a strong wall, but it’s enough to shield me from the harsh ray of sun. It might not be the best roof, but it’s enough to keep me from the rain. For someone who has nothing, do you have any idea how much of a luxury all that for me?
Remember how I always said that I am drowning in a muddy road? That I can only stay floating thanks to my bleeding hand that keep on holding onto a frayed rope? I feel that someone finally reach my hand. He carry me away from that muddy ground easily. He stop all those hand from pulling me down, he stop all those screaming that driving me insane. Gently, he clean me from all those mud. As if I am a precious thing, he treat all of my pain carefully. He cry out of joy, just by having me around. He cry out of joy for having someone as worn out as me.
Of course that melts my frozen heart..
Q: Does he love you.?
A: He said he does. I can feel it in his gaze and in his touch. It obvious in how he get worried sick about even the tiniest sign of pain or exhaustion that I showed, how he refuse to let me do anything that looks hard, how he only let me do the easy part. Once, he almost cried when he said: “Why didn’t we meet sooner?”. He also almost cried when he said: “God loves me, after everything I’ve been through, He gives me a woman like you..”. He get jealous easily. He is very caring.
You know, one day, when I was with him, I feel that he makes sure to drive safely. But the other day, one when I am not around, all of his passenger get worried and can’t sleep because he drive a bit in hurried just so he can meet me earlier.
I guess, with all that, I can conclude that he loves me.. right?
Q: Lol! Enough of bragging. Who is this mysterious guy anyway?
A: Peeps, meet Aulia Budiman also known as Budi. Born in March 24th, 1982. Yep, 7 years older than me. A goofy guy who jokes around a lot. A skinny guy who no matter how much he eat, would still has a hard time gaining even one pounds. He is a great cooks, with a lot of experience and have a great relationship with people from various background. He loves any food makes from peanut and drink coffee all the time. A smoker who is currently trying to stop smoking since his wife-soon-to-be can’t handle the cigarette. His father and my parent come from the same village. He is well known for his great personality. He is tall – for Indonesian, 175 cm – and has a bright skin complexion, brighter than me. He loves his family and adore kids. He plays guitar, keyboard and drum. He sings. He always update himself with the world news etc. A bit too perfect for me but who cares? I hit the jackpot!
Q: Congratulation then. So, when is the big day?
A: Coming soon okay? Engagement day was on May 27th. I’ll let you know when we the day is near. Please pray that everything would went smoothly for us.
I guess that’s been long enough. Thanks for reading and may God grant each of you your dream man/woman.